This morning I took my youngest six and went to Aldi's to do our weekly shopping trip. The oldest two stayed home to do their school work. I assumed my 15yo would want to stay home, but asked anyways, and yes, she wanted to to get her school work done. I checked with my 10yo if she wanted to go with me or stay and do her school work. Her eyes got big and she says "uh no. I want to stay and get my school work done." She was very polite and respectful, but it was almost a "duh mama" moment. lol! I was so pleased with her diligent attitude!!
Anywho, we have set rules for grocery trips. Well any store type trips. Or any sort of outings really.
-They are to walk inside the store in a nice, neat, line - youngest behind me up to the oldest. Works really well! The olders can keep tabs on everyone in front of them, I keep an eye out for traffic and such from the front and call out directions, and everyone in the middle just has to pay attention and be obedient. Plus it looks really fun and orderly to walk in this way. 😃
-Once we have our cart they are assigned a spot. Babies go in the cart, Littles walk next to the cart with a hand on it at all times, and the rest are paired up in two's behind me, in age order, helping to keep tabs on everyone.
-They are to not touch anything.
-Use quiet voices and not chat at Mama a lot. I tend to get overwhelmed in stores fairly easily. The more busy it is, the faster I get there. Having kids chat at me non-stop while trying to shop just doesn't work. If they have a question or need something, they are free to talk to me, but they are also to try to just wait until we're in the van or back home. Using quiet voices is also very important. I can tell they are talking to each other and not trying to get my attention, plus I'm sure not everyone wants to hear their conversation, even if it is planning their next nerf war.
-No one is allowed to ask for anything. The younger set doesn't always remember this rule, but it's okay. I just remind them of the rule, that's it's perfectly fine to admire things they see, and maybe even want it, but they still can't ask for it. It's a good time for them to practice contentment and to want/enjoy something they see without coveting it.
-There is to be absolutely no wrestling, poking, bothering, roughhousing, or anything of the sort. None. When we're in line they can chat with each other about things they see or what they want to do when they get home.....but acting up, even in play or a friendly manner, isn't to be done.
Back to this morning....the kids were being pretty good. They weren't staying in their assigned spots 100% and I kept having to remind them. The 4yo needed to walk after a bit because the cart was getting too full for him to sit in it. The 3yo kept chatting, and not very quietly. The 1yo kept trying to escape from the cart, so I used the buckle so he wouldn't jump out.....but that didn't make him happy, so he kept fussing here and there. The 9, 7, & 6yo's were having a grand time. (read: they had lots of energy) I was trying to keep them busy by helping me get items from the shelves. The 7yo took it upon herself to organize the cart....even if I was pushing the cart, she would stand in front of the cart, keep organizing, and walk backwards. 🙄
It was busy. Not the store. Just my corner of the world in the store. 😁
When we were checking out, I got a bit more overwhelmed. We were in Aldi's where you have to unload your cart, they check you out crazy fast, often faster than you can unload, there was a line behind me, the 9yo was helping me unload, the babies in the cart were getting fussy, and the other three were having a giggle fest. Once we were unloaded I had the oldest four go stand next to the bagging counter. They were all standing fairly still, although one was play hugging another, they were all talking and giggling like crazy. Slowly getting louder
All I can see is them moving and getting louder. I call to them to quiet down and be still, while trying to get my groceries paid for and getting the babies out of my cart and into the cart my groceries were now in (gotta be an Aldi's shopper to understand this one). I make my way over to the kids and start getting on to them for not being more obedient. I was disappointed they weren't obeying me better. And I told them this. I wasn't angry, but I was getting more and more frazzled.
I had just finished quietly speaking to them when a grandma who had been shopping almost with us the whole time walked by on her way out the door. As she walks by she gives me this huge grin, and says "You did so good Mama! Your kids were just great. Keep up the good work."
Kinda stopped me in my tracks. I smiled back and said "thank you", but inside I was rethinking the trip and asking myself questions. Were the kids really as bad as I thought? What exactly did they do that was so wrong that you are so disappointed in them?
Once I stepped back and looked at them and their behavior from another's viewpoint I realized they were actually very good. Sure, they could have stood still better and they could have been quieter. But overall they did good.
Usually I'm the one who is good at keeping a good perspective and seeing their behavior for what it really is, but not today.
The sweet stranger in the store provided me with a good refresher in seeing things for what it really is. It was a good lesson in keeping a good perspective, in focusing on the good and not the negative, being encouraging and giving out lots of praise, and remembering that kids will be kids at times. Even though they were giggling and chatting and the one was play hugging another until the one being hugged almost busted a gut from laughing so hard.....they were staying in their space, they weren't running around the store, they were throwing a tantrum, they were being pleasant, and it was a joy to most people to see their behavior and joy with each other.
Sometimes as mama's we forget to see things the way they really are. I'm so thankful for these reminders GOD gives me. For the people GOD puts into my life to encourage me, to remind me to see things the way they really are, and to focus on the good.
Anywho, we have set rules for grocery trips. Well any store type trips. Or any sort of outings really.
-They are to walk inside the store in a nice, neat, line - youngest behind me up to the oldest. Works really well! The olders can keep tabs on everyone in front of them, I keep an eye out for traffic and such from the front and call out directions, and everyone in the middle just has to pay attention and be obedient. Plus it looks really fun and orderly to walk in this way. 😃
-Once we have our cart they are assigned a spot. Babies go in the cart, Littles walk next to the cart with a hand on it at all times, and the rest are paired up in two's behind me, in age order, helping to keep tabs on everyone.
-They are to not touch anything.
-Use quiet voices and not chat at Mama a lot. I tend to get overwhelmed in stores fairly easily. The more busy it is, the faster I get there. Having kids chat at me non-stop while trying to shop just doesn't work. If they have a question or need something, they are free to talk to me, but they are also to try to just wait until we're in the van or back home. Using quiet voices is also very important. I can tell they are talking to each other and not trying to get my attention, plus I'm sure not everyone wants to hear their conversation, even if it is planning their next nerf war.
-No one is allowed to ask for anything. The younger set doesn't always remember this rule, but it's okay. I just remind them of the rule, that's it's perfectly fine to admire things they see, and maybe even want it, but they still can't ask for it. It's a good time for them to practice contentment and to want/enjoy something they see without coveting it.
-There is to be absolutely no wrestling, poking, bothering, roughhousing, or anything of the sort. None. When we're in line they can chat with each other about things they see or what they want to do when they get home.....but acting up, even in play or a friendly manner, isn't to be done.
Back to this morning....the kids were being pretty good. They weren't staying in their assigned spots 100% and I kept having to remind them. The 4yo needed to walk after a bit because the cart was getting too full for him to sit in it. The 3yo kept chatting, and not very quietly. The 1yo kept trying to escape from the cart, so I used the buckle so he wouldn't jump out.....but that didn't make him happy, so he kept fussing here and there. The 9, 7, & 6yo's were having a grand time. (read: they had lots of energy) I was trying to keep them busy by helping me get items from the shelves. The 7yo took it upon herself to organize the cart....even if I was pushing the cart, she would stand in front of the cart, keep organizing, and walk backwards. 🙄
It was busy. Not the store. Just my corner of the world in the store. 😁
When we were checking out, I got a bit more overwhelmed. We were in Aldi's where you have to unload your cart, they check you out crazy fast, often faster than you can unload, there was a line behind me, the 9yo was helping me unload, the babies in the cart were getting fussy, and the other three were having a giggle fest. Once we were unloaded I had the oldest four go stand next to the bagging counter. They were all standing fairly still, although one was play hugging another, they were all talking and giggling like crazy. Slowly getting louder
All I can see is them moving and getting louder. I call to them to quiet down and be still, while trying to get my groceries paid for and getting the babies out of my cart and into the cart my groceries were now in (gotta be an Aldi's shopper to understand this one). I make my way over to the kids and start getting on to them for not being more obedient. I was disappointed they weren't obeying me better. And I told them this. I wasn't angry, but I was getting more and more frazzled.
I had just finished quietly speaking to them when a grandma who had been shopping almost with us the whole time walked by on her way out the door. As she walks by she gives me this huge grin, and says "You did so good Mama! Your kids were just great. Keep up the good work."
Kinda stopped me in my tracks. I smiled back and said "thank you", but inside I was rethinking the trip and asking myself questions. Were the kids really as bad as I thought? What exactly did they do that was so wrong that you are so disappointed in them?
Once I stepped back and looked at them and their behavior from another's viewpoint I realized they were actually very good. Sure, they could have stood still better and they could have been quieter. But overall they did good.
Usually I'm the one who is good at keeping a good perspective and seeing their behavior for what it really is, but not today.
The sweet stranger in the store provided me with a good refresher in seeing things for what it really is. It was a good lesson in keeping a good perspective, in focusing on the good and not the negative, being encouraging and giving out lots of praise, and remembering that kids will be kids at times. Even though they were giggling and chatting and the one was play hugging another until the one being hugged almost busted a gut from laughing so hard.....they were staying in their space, they weren't running around the store, they were throwing a tantrum, they were being pleasant, and it was a joy to most people to see their behavior and joy with each other.
Sometimes as mama's we forget to see things the way they really are. I'm so thankful for these reminders GOD gives me. For the people GOD puts into my life to encourage me, to remind me to see things the way they really are, and to focus on the good.
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